To say Barclay is active would be like comparing a lion to a kitten. It’s nowhere near an accurate description! At around 2, Barclay was diagnosed with a speech disorder called Childhood Apraxia of Speech (CAS). This caused him to suffer a significant regression in speech and fine motor skills. However, his gross motor skills remained completely intact. In fact, he could do things some typically developing kids physically couldn’t do. I used to take Barclay to a kids’ gym, and he could hang upside down on the monkey bar and then raise his feet to the bar, almost flipping over. He also had zero fear of heights. He could jump on one foot and walk backward with his eyes closed. He could run for hours!
There were definitely also things we noticed that concerned us. Barclay was impulsive to the point that it began to be unsafe. It was as if his brain couldn’t think as fast as his body would move. I had to always worry about him running into traffic or jumping off of high places. Unless he was sleeping, it seemed as though his little body just couldn’t stop.
We took Barclay to a developmental pediatrician to see what was going on. It didn’t take the pediatrician long before she said Barclay had severe Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). It was impacting every aspect of his life.
ADHD is a neurological disorder marked by an ongoing pattern of impulsivity, hyperactivity, and the inability to focus. It also impacts a person’s executive functioning skills, such as planning and working memory. No wonder Barclay struggled to learn to speak. His body couldn’t rest long enough for his brain to catch up. This made so much sense.
Barclay had already been receiving speech therapy and behavior therapy services, but we also realized that we needed to adapt some of how our family functioned. For example, we decided that going to public places like parks that didn’t have physical boundaries such as a fence was off the table for now. No physical boundaries for Barclay meant he needed to explore as far as the eye could see, and that was a safety issue. We also had to learn to scale back our expectations of his development. Children with ADHD are approximately 20-30 percent developmentally delayed behind their same-age peers. So at age 3, Barclay was just hitting many of the milestones a 2-year-old would hit. That meant things like potty training and being able to dress and undress became lower down the list of priorities.
It has been a little over a year since Barclay received his ADHD diagnosis. We continue to help him overcome the challenges this brings. However, each day, we also learn to look for small changes we can make as a family to help him be happy and successful.
Are there ways in which your family has adapted for your child with ADHD that have worked? Please comment and share!
You can’t change who you are, and you shouldn’t be asked to. – Jonathan Mooney